Things I Learnt In Amsterdam
- Never underestimate a Dutch cyclist.
- There is a strict right-of-way system in Amsterdam: trams, buses, cyclists and everybody else.
- A Dutch bike has three features: a squeak, a rattle and a pretty girl on the back.
- Never trust a sign mounted on a lamp-post: the locals hate tourists and like to mess about with them.
- You think a Smartcar is small? In Amsterdam, there are tiny hooded scooters which even I would have to curl into a ball to fit into - and they’re unlicensed. Can you think of anything scarier than a pothead on a scooter? (Apart from me riding one, that is?)
- The canals in Amsterdam are approximately 30% water, 30% bike and 30% other (cars, bodies, rubbish…)
- A beep, a ring of a bell or a shout from a passing vehicle is not a catcall; more likely, an anti-tourist local.
- Never trust me to read a map, or you may find yourself in the North Sea. On a pedalo.
- Speaking of pedalos: the best thing about them is getting back onto dry land. (This didn’t stop us hiring one out twice.)
- You haven’t actually seen it all until you’ve seen a male mannequin (with six pack) wearing a pale blue silk thong decorated in pretty pink flowers.
- Aqua’s Barbie Girl sounds even sillier sung by the Dutch.
- Don’t indulge the street merchants on the edge of the Red Light District; baking soda does not make for an effective stimulant, icing sugar is meant for oral consumption and cocaine is not supposed to be Pine Fresh.
Posted: July 18th, 2008 under personal.
Tags: travelling
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Time November 17, 2008 at 3:37 pm
[...] Continuing my Things I Learnt In… series, Paris! [...]